Mz Paws Still Missing: Fans Gather

MZ PAWS PICS

CREATE FUROR

ON FOURTH

As most Americans were spending a quiet Fourth of July holiday enjoying fireworks, fans of the "Sophisti-cat" known only as Mz Paws showed outrage yesterday when a certain newspaper, which shall hereby go unnamed, published photos of the celebrity trying to escape the paparazzi.

"Freedom for Mz Paws!" was the chant picked up by hundreds of fans as they stood in 90 degree heat at the bottom of a local staircase, waiting for a glimpse of the (in)famous Blogosphere Commentator. (The staircase, pictured 2 days ago in this blog, has since been found.)

"We only hope she's all right," said a fan, while eating sardines from a tin. "The Great Feline only knows what's behind the door at the top of those stairs!" When asked about the tan and white striped fur coat he was wearing, the same fan showed his true claws. "Don't get your whiskers all bent out of shape. I know it's not PC to wear fur. All of Mz Paws' fans do. But she can't help wearing fur, and neither can I."

That particular fan has not been back since yesterday. Another tin of sardines was put out by his friends later in the day, but the fan did not return. The majority of fans kept vigil all night, despite the sweltering heat, which topped 100 degrees. At one point, a joke began circulating (no one would say where it had started, and only fans were allowed to laugh at the joke):

What turns a lot a fans on really fast? Answer: Mz Paws!

As for the true whereabouts of Mz Paws, and what might be Behind the White Door, we will keep you "posted."